I’m feeling the value and power of a dime these days, but it has nothing to do with our current economic crisis.

On July 23, 2006, my niece’s fiancé, Ryder Mapes died too young from non-Hodgkins Lymphoma at the age of 22. Even more sobering than that reality is that if the insidious disease has been diagnosed earlier, he might still be here today to see his beautiful daughter Ella Rose turn four in May.

Ryder was truly a unique, gifted individual and somewhat rebellious, which is probably how he caught my niece’s eye. Yet given the fact that at age 22 he felt immortal (who doesn’t?) it also didn’t help that he didn’t have health insurance. In retrospect, the signs were there that he wasn’t feeling well for quite some time, leaving us all of his friends and family to ponder “if only I had said xx to him or if maybe we had really, really tried harder he would have went to a clinic earlier and saw the right type of doctor…..” When he was finally diagnosed, it was quite advanced and spreading throughout his body.

At this point I could get on my “soapbox” and talk about how the health care system is totally broken in this country. Okay, I guess I will step up on the box, but just for a minute, I promise! It was upsetting – and at times traumatic - to Ryder and all of his family and friends of the “hoops” and struggles he had to go through to get to a proper diagnosis. Many helped him when and where they could, but there is also no doubt that all of the roadblocks impacted his personal motivation to pursue getting the correct and timely diagnosis and treatment. I’m all for personal accountability, but if you do not - or do not know how to - advocate for yourself when it comes to your own health care, it can be a long struggle to find out what is wrong. And that is even when you actually HAVE health insurance. It is a shame that good health care is still a privilege in this country. I see it as a human right, and I do take some solace knowing that I am not alone in that opinion. But alas, I’ve digressed too far from my intention of sharing this story with you and will get off the “soapbox.”
Just as I now have more hope that quality health care will be available for all citizens some day in this country, I also have hope and peace in my heart via the spiritual power of a dime. Let me explain.

Shortly after Ryder’s death, my sister Jan and her daughter Jenni, who was Ryder’s fiancé and mother of their daughter, Ella Rose, participated in a psychic gathering along with some of Ryder’s family members. My sister and her immediate family were closely involved with Ryder’s care and support during his illness. I know, I know - there are many skeptics of psychics that claim to channel with the afterlife, and odds are you are one of them. I’m sure the skeptics of a psychic’s ability will remain questionable by many now and forever. But I view psychic channeling like most of us approach faith – doubt is the greatest part of faith (someone famous said that, I think) and if we could or had to “prove” something all the time, life would be much more dull and less inspiring. As an example, if we truly had undeniable proof of alien life my husband would be really bummed as his beloved UFO conspiracy shows would probably go off the air. Come to think of it, it would mean less time spent zoned out in front of the television, and that would be a good thing as far as I am concerned!

But not so long ago, I was psychic skeptic too. During the gathering my sister attended, the psychic turned to her and said (having never met her, never conversed with her before) and mentioned that the dimes she had been finding around the house were signs from Ryder and to remind you he is still “around” the psychic shared. Shocked, my sister about fell off her chair – wait a minute, I think she actually did! She HAD noticed finding dimes around the house lately in unusual places. The psychic also shared with her things that my Dad had been doing to sense his presence to her in the afterlife as well as Dad had died suddenly about 6 months after Ryder. But the biggest mind-blower for Jan was the dimes from Ryder. Of course, my sister was excited to share this with everyone who wasn’t there to witness this conversation with the psychic first-hand, myself included. I was awestruck but still wasn’t quite sure what to think. I wasn’t sure about this psychic thing, yet wanted to believe. I “absorbed” the information, shared it friends in a “listen-to-this-totally-wild-encounter-my-sister-had-with-a-psychic” mode and went on about my life.

Then it started happening at my house. Jan was over to my house one day and found a dime in the sink while cleaning up after a family gathering. We laughed, and said “Ryder’s here!” and went about clearing up. A few weeks later, I’d find dimes in corners while vacuuming, dimes found in the garage by the car door, a dime sitting alone in a desk drawer, a lone dime in my pocket. Why not quarters, why not pennies? I realize dimes can be found in places where you might pull out car keys or kick accidently in corners, but again, why dimes and only dimes? I know Ryder was fond of my husband and me. One day after the dimes started appearing to me and I hadn’t shared yet with my husband, he said “I swear there is ghost in this house. I keep finding dimes everywhere!” He had totally forgotten the psychic/Ryder/dime thing when he said that. I looked at him and my jaw dropped. It was then that something in my heart and soul found peace and joy, particularly on a day when I kind of needed it. It also helps me share some ongoing positive and spiritual conversations with my 8-year-old Erik about heaven and afterlife. He just loves it when we find dimes and what they represent. It comforts all of us.
And I still find dimes. Just last week, I was lying in bed, unable to sleep and thought that perhaps I could smell the incontinence issue of our older cat somewhere in the bed. As I was feeling around the bed searching for dampness, getting angry with the cat and frustrated that I couldn’t sleep, and I found a dime. Nothing else, just a dime. I felt it in the dark, thinking it could be a penny, but the size and ridges around the outside told me it was a dime.

I stuck in under my pillow and I laughed because I remember Ryder’s sense of humor and wouldn’t put it past him to alert me to his presence in such an “odorous” manner. But it was Ryder, telling me to ease my mind get some sleep. So, behold and stay open to the presence and power of loved ones who have passed on. They are with you always. And believe with me in the power of dime during these troubling times.